Mitt Romney, Republican hopeful for the Presidential nomination in the USA, delivered a bizarre online ad this week responding to Chuck Norris support for the Mike Huckabee campaign. Chuck Norris, well known in the States for his role in Walker, Texas Ranger, and for his martial arts championship, appeared at a conference backing Huckabee earlier this week. When asked how much he’d round house kick Romney, he replied by saying he didn’t do round house, he did chokes.
“Two good men, both into fitness, both love Chuck Norris. But where do they stand on crime? Chuck Norris – give a presidential pardon to no-one ever. Norris subdues criminals with just an icy stare. Mike Huckabee? He granted 1033 pardons and commutations twelve convicted murderers. Huckabee granted more clemencies than the three previous governors combined. Chuck Norris, Mike Huckabee. Now who deserves a roundhouse kick?”
Romney’s online ad refers to a humorous column written by Norris for WorldNetDaily. Chuck Norris presidential policies not highlighted by Romney:
- Require members of Congress to work out on the Total Gym 15 minutes each day – or else they can’t vote on anything.
- Cut spending by dismissing the Secret Service, at least for my eight years in office (why would I need them?).
- Resurrect Bruce Lee and appoint him head of homeland security (OK, the CIA and FBI too).
- Turn the Rose Garden into a new fighting ring for the World Combat League, in which liberals and conservatives will fight for legislative leadership and priority.
- Require Bill Gates and Warren Buffet to personally pay for national, comprehensive medical coverage for every American
- Increase jobs in America by sending ninja teams to sabotage and steal them back from other countries.
- Tattoo an American flag with the words, “In God we trust,” on the forehead of every atheist.